In Communist Russia...

...Toilet pees on you.



The backstory:

So I followed my cousin and his wife back to their swanky 5 star hotel after lunch to freshen up and prepare for another afternoon outing. Now, I've stayed at my fair share of dives over the last couple of months so I was a bit unaccustomed to seeing what real hotel rooms look like. I must have spent a good few minutes rustling through complimentary bars of soap and shampoo bottles, disposable slippers and toothbrushes, working fixtures and the attached bathroom. All that good stuff.

Then I came upon this high tech piece of porcelain:

I imagine this type of thing belongs in a rocket ship or some ancient world expo's "home of tomorrow" exhibit.

A closer look at the knobs:

#1

#2

Our best guess was that knob number 2 is for uh... number 1 cleanup and vice versa. I took it upon myself to test them out to make sure, hence the video. We're still not clear on the function of knob #2.

I wasn't expecting it to shoot out with a force great enough to rupture a colon. It's a good thing I wear glasses.